How this blog is organized

In each blog. I will share some skill/tip/tool that has helped my husband and me move forward. Remember, it’s not just the person with the condition who has quills; it’s two porcupines, each with quills that are experienced by the other! Also, it’s two porcupines that love each other and can look for each other’s loving places.

“Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.” – Alan Cohen (Wisdom of the Heart, 2002)

Yale Conference on BPD Presentation

Jun 8, 2022 | Yale Conference on BPD

I was honored to be selected as a speaker for the 17th Annual Yale/NEABPD Conference on BPD, held on May 6, 2022. The title of my webinar was, “Porcupine Love™®: Dealing with Dysregulated Behaviors in a Long-Term Romantic Relationship Where One Has BPD or Its...

Couples with BPD & “60-Second-Repairs”©

Mar 27, 2022 | 60-second Repairs

Presumably every close personal relationship in humankind encounters troubles or conflict. Research reveals that a major factor leading to relationships staying together over time is doing repairs after troubles or conflict (Gottman). Many experts in this area will...

Couples with BPD or Emotion Dysregulation: Write Your Partner a Playbook ©

Mar 5, 2022 | playbook

Couples with Symptoms of BPD, “Tip: Write Your Partner A ‘Playbook’ & Share It with Them Frequently” This is something each of you can consider doing for your partner to help them understand and know you better, especially for...

Welcome: Couples Where One Struggles with Emotion Dysregulation or BPD

Feb 14, 2022 | borderline brain

To the person with borderline personality disorder, I hear your pain—the agonizing, stabbing-in-the-gut-with-a-red-hot poker pain that utterly strips away anything but that stabbing and the desire to make it stop! Sadly, I'm not aware of anyone or anything that can...